When I need a lift-me-up, I listen to this song. When I need a reminder that "it's not that bad," I listen to this song. When I just want a beat to bop-my-head, dance-in-my-chair-to, I put on this song.
I've been in a funny sort of mood all day. My day started out fine, meaning no hassle: had time to straighten my hair, sit and drink my green smoothie while watching the traffic and weather reports, and still got to court by 8:30 (without running two long blocks in four-inch heels!).
But then, I heard his name directed at me with a question mark, and all of that changed. My heart started beating just a little faster, and although I tried to mask my sudden jitters, the turn of my head with every footstep heard from the courtroom door probably made my discomposure obvious. (And as if the clunking of heels would be his!) I didn't really think he would walk in, that out of all the courtrooms, he'd come into the one I was in. But there was an unspoken part of me that wanted to see his face. Just a glimpse of familiarity. I didn't see him. But the mention of his name with mine, the words "we" and "us" once upon a time, were enough to bring back that longing for just the slightest touch of his fingers on mine.
So, I've been listening to this song. Because I needed a lift-me-up, a reminder that life is actually very good, and these feelings are wonderful and should be cherished -because missing someone also means that we had something special. To miss.
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