The Right Yeses

I started this month with this goal: say no to all invitations. The last few months have been quite stressful and I was feeling as if I was being pulled in different directions. I longed for some time to recluse myself from everything and everyone. I just wanted to sleep all day, read all day and watch television all day, for several days, all by myself. But, I also needed to catch up on work, on writing and organizing my life. So, I was going to say no to everything and everyone.

But, only a few days into the month, a friend asked if I'd drive with her to Napa. She promised a weekend of unplanned events and time for me to write while she studied. It took me less than five minutes to say yes.

And last Friday, we went on our road trip.

We stopped by Cayucos for the best grilled fish tacos and brown butter cookies.

Although a part of me felt that I couldn't really afford to take a weekend off or a weekend away, there was a louder part of me that said I needed to. And the moment we got on the road, I knew that louder part of me was right.

I had forgotten how beautiful the drive is to Northern California. Plus, the weather was warm, the sky blue and a lot of green everywhere. There were moments I forgot that I was in California or the United States because the scenery around me just seemed like a worlds away from where I came from. I was reminded of how much I loved road trips, how being on the road, leaving everything behind can do wonders to a stressed mind. Leaving Cayucos, we took this winding road amid mountains and large beautifully aged canopy trees that had perfectly crooked branches. Seeing them I realized that it was not a matter of learning to say no that makes a difference, but learning to choose the right yeses.

Last weekend, I chose the right yes.

The Riverfront in Downtown Napa.

The view from where we had dinner at The Pear Southern Bistro.

A nice cold beer to unwind after an afternoon of writing.

An intimate, sit-down wine tasting experience was the best way to end the weekend.

Ladybugs make me happy.

Napa was just what I needed. I came back more inspired to write. The weighed down feeling I had before I left for the trip was gone. Sometimes, all it takes is allowing yourself to step away for a few days to get your bearings back. We all need a rejuvenation break once in a while. It reminds me of what my aunt said to me a long time ago: like a car, our minds and bodies also need regular tune-ups for maintenance and better performance. Napa was my tune-up.

Also, I can't believe how time flies but Skylights Magazine finally launches this Friday. I'm beyond excited and nervous at the same time. You can sign up here for a notification. I'd love to see you there!

Fear no more: how hiking Angels Landing changed me

During Labor Day weekend I went on a hiking trip to Zion National Park with about 30 strangers. Yes, you read that right. I broke free from my overly paranoid and rather rigid comfort zone to travel across state lines with people whose last names I didn't even know.

There is no denying I was nervous about it. As the trip neared, I constantly thought about backing out or asking the group leaders if I can bring a friend. When I did neither, I told my friends I'd text them the make, model and license plate of the car I'd be riding in. But, I didn't end up doing that either. Deep down inside I knew that I wouldn't be in any danger. My true fear was my own discomfort in rooming with strangers, sitting in the back seat for an extended period of time with them, making small talk and being left behind on the hike. Okay, the latter could have been a little dangerous but as it turned out, the group was very conscientious about making sure no one was left behind or lost. So, I was okay.

And I'm so happy I didn't back out. Hiking in Zion was an amazing experience. And the fact that I did so with strangers added something more to it. I learned that when you're with people who don't know you, you can be anyone or anything you want. In my case, I decided I could be brave and strong and even a little adventurous. Despite my fear of lizards and geckos and encountering one while climbing a rock and holding on to dear life at the edge of a cliff, I hiked (and at times, climbed) this:

Angels Landing. At the top, the elevation is 5,790 feet. The picture above is the last leg of it, which consists of a narrow and steep trail with support chains anchored along portions of the route. My key in getting through this final summit to the top was never looking to my right and never looking back. I didn't really look up either. I only focused on what was right in front of me. In doing so I learned there's no room for doubt when you're focused on the present. There's no room for fear when you're focused on surviving, when your goal is not to fall off a canyon and die.

When we hiked Angels Landing it was in the middle of the afternoon and the temperature was over a hundred degrees. So, we were definitely faced with other challenges. But again, all that mattered to me was getting to the top alive. It didn't matter that my clothes were drenched in sweat, my face was a combination of oil and dust, and I smelled like two-week old soiled dirty laundry.

I made it to the top.

It felt beyond amazing. At that moment I felt like I could overcome anything. And for the first time, for as long as I can remember, I wasn't scared or worried. I wasn't scared of being cheesy and excited and happy (hence the pose). I wasn't scared of being vulnerable. I wasn't scared of just being myself. At 5,790 feet I overcame my fear of getting hurt and failing. All the trials and challenges that I had been through, and was going through, just seemed really small and insignificant from up there.

So, without consciously intending it to be, that was the point of this trip: to push myself beyond the confines of my past and circumstances. To find that person in me who is capable of being brave and happy and strong. And finally, to just live what I've been preaching: change comes with movement.

Travel Tuesday || Travel lessons

Many, many years ago, when I was just a young law school graduate, I spent a month walking around Europe. Well, Madrid, Barcelona, Ibiza, Rome, Florence, Venice, Milan, London, Amsterdam, and Paris, to be exact. Nope, I didn't backpack my way through and I didn't stay in hostels, but I did walk. Everywhere that my two feet can take me in those cities. And since I was such an amateur traveler at that time (as well as a poor, unemployed student), I didn't have proper walking shoes, just a pair of really good wedge flip flops. I didn't even get the wedge for comfort but to add some height to me since I'm really short and I had this fear of being mistaken as a child and kidnapped. But, I digress.

There are so many stories about that trip I've been wanting to write about. I learned a lot in that month. Not only about the different cities and countries we visited, but about myself and my travel partner. I got lucky that my friend, Claudia, and I got along well. Although there were moments when we got on each other's nerves, we managed to have a great time through the ups and downs, i.e. missing luggage, torn luggage, getting lost (many, many times), high fevers, non air conditioned room, heatwave, thunderstorms, windstorms, etc. In reminiscing about that trip, I thought I'd list some of the things I learned:

1. If you're traveling on a budget, and do not want to stay in hostels, stay at a hotel that has free breakfast. No matter how little sleep Claudia and I got the night before, we got up early in the morning for the free breakfast and loaded up on muffins, fruit, cereal and coffee. It saved us from spending money on breakfast and lunch, so we were able to afford a good dinner. Although we didn't splurge on expensive dinners either, we did go to at least one nice restaurant in every city. 

2. Choose your travel partner carefully and wisely, especially if there's only the two of you traveling together. In our case, Claudia and I shared a room and spent every day together for a month. That was 30 days of togetherness. So, it was important that we got along. It was important that we communicated. We didn't have all the same interests in terms of what we wanted to see and experience at every destination, but we had a give and take policy. We took turns choosing what we would do for the day and evening, and there were no complaints. Okay, sometimes there were, but we agreed to agree. And we agreed to stay together always. Except for one party that Claudia went to in Ibiza with our tour group while I stayed at the hotel to sleep (I was much too tired), we stuck together. I believe it's important to stay together especially if you're two young women traveling in a foreign country. (And although Ibiza was wild, I was reassured that Claudia would be okay since by that time, we had been traveling with the tour group for over a week and she promised not to wander away from them. I still didn't get much sleep, but the extreme humidity and heat with no air condition may have been a factor. Nonetheless, we stuck together for the rest of the trip - no matter how tired either one of us were.)

3. A tour group is not a bad way to go. Since it was our first trip to Europe, Claudia and I opted to go with a tour group around Spain and to London, Amsterdam and Paris. We did Italy on our own, which turned out fine since we were already accustomed to the euro and had become a pro at reading maps.

4. Pack lightly, especially if you will be traveling every three days to a different city. Carrying or rolling around a large suitcase on cobblestone streets can be a health hazard resulting in excruciating pain on your arms, legs and back. If that happens, you will most likely not enjoy your trip. Remember that there are laundromats in most places (at least most big cities), and if there isn't one, well, undergarments, T-shirts, and tank tops are not too difficult to hand wash. 

5. If you're traveling to a foreign country, exchange money before you reach your place of destination or at least at the airport when you arrive. I hardly carry cash with me, but when traveling (especially to a foreign country), it's important to at least have enough cash to pay for a taxi from the airport to the hotel. Madrid was the city Claudia and I landed in to start our European vacation. We arrived during siesta time, which meant that all the banks were closed. Again, since we were newbie travelers, we only had traveler's checks (remember this was a long time ago), which the cab drivers were not accepting nor were they accepting American dollars. Of course, we learned all of this only after the cab driver was already stopped in front of our hotel. It was a stressful way to start our vacation with an angry cab driver who we could barely understand. But finally, past the language barrier and frustration, he took us to an ATM to withdraw cash. We weren't yet accustomed to the euro at that time, so I think we got jipped. Our cab fare ended up costing us about fifty dollars each. I think it was supposed to be fifty dollars total. But, I guess we deserved it for being ignorant. Now, I always check the average cost of the cab fare beforehand. The Internet is wonderful that way.

Here's a few pictures from that European adventure:

La Sagrada Familia, Barcelona, Spain

Rome, Italy

Florence, Italy

Big Ben, London, England

Paris, France

This was our last stop before we headed home. As you can see, I look tired. But I also look very happy. I wanted to stay in Paris. If I didn't have my brother's wedding, I might have stayed. Got a job at a cafe and wrote. After walking its streets, I understood why many writers were (are) drawn to Paris. I want to return to Paris to write. One day.

      

happy travels!

I know I haven't been doing a great job keeping up with the Blog Every Day in May Challenge.  I tell you, I'm quite disappointed with myself, too.  But, this thing called work (along with writing classes) has kept me very busy these days.  I know, what a stinker!  But, I noticed that today's topic is "only pictures," and I thought, yes, I can do that!  So, thought I'd share some of my favorite travel photos.  Hope you enjoy!

Aww, just looking at these make me want to go on vacation again!