It's been a rough week, hence my absence here. Then, as if things couldn't get worst, my computer went haywire at the office forcing me to go home early today. I came home to a dark apartment with my blinds all drawn shut, and I went straight to my room and into my bed. Then, I watched the last two episodes of Glee, and literally cried for two hours.
I needed that cry though.
My uncontrollable sobbing started when Blaine sang "Hey Jude" during the Beatles episode from two weeks ago. I think I mentioned before that Glee reminds me of an old friend, one of my childhood best friends. I refer to him as Jude because of his favorite Beatles song. Well, Finn reminds me of Jude. Those who knew him would disagree. Jude was disliked by most of my friends. But, they didn't know the Jude I knew. And the person I knew had Finn inside of him. On the surface, he was more like Puck. (And from last night's episode, we saw that Puck has a sensitive side, too.) But, Finn was who I imagined Jude to have been like if life didn't get so crazy for him.
I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason. Jude was placed in mine at a very young age. Maybe so that one day, I would pursue a career where I can be a voice for those who are lost like he was. Maybe so that one day, I will write a book about the gifts of love that are the people who come into our lives. In the show, Kurt said that he will spend his entire life missing Finn. Some people may think that can't be real. But if so, what a sad life. I feel bad for people who would think that way. I have spent 20 years missing Jude. And I know that I will spend my entire life missing him. But, I'm also grateful that I had a Jude in my life. It wasn't easy to love him and be his friend, but I guess, it wasn't easy to love me either. Yet, he still did. I knew that when he let me go.
